Maybe my last one....

Maybe it is... I was inspired to write by some1 but now that inspiration and priced posession of mine..i feel is draining..I wrote this poem for a friend but i feel i give in too much to a lot of things that i feel is not good... and even wonder if its something worthed at all..and i always come to a conclusion that it is totally worthed...... Its this strong aversion i am gettin these days which i really hate to say..... I am not writing this to hurt anyone but its just that my priced posession is going against me... it makes me cry more than it wud make me smile ....i miss myself these days.... my only hope in life who was helping me get back to being me.. i feel isnt there anymore...
Maybe this might be my last poem ...

the inspiration that let me be me...
the indpiration thst encouraged me....
the inspiration that was giving me a beeming smile without my saying a word...
the inspiration that wuda held my hand without a brink....
the inspiration that wudnt have thought that i am a pest...
the inspiration that made me that made me sing & dance...
the inspiration that wudnt have let me not be myself...
the inspiration who i thought was the most important part my life...
the inspiration that kept me going
the inspiration that wuda been there before any1 else
the inspiration with so much love
the inspiration with such pleasing face
the inspiration i thought wud accept me for who i am
the inspiration that I luv
the inspiration who was my inspiration

I feel has gone.. i dont think i can ever write again...
I mite have been at fault...and maybe i am OR I am complelety.. i wud admit it...either ways... i still wish to dedicate this to my friend.. and i really hope you keep smiling always.. !! i will always luv u the same way...no matter what... Happy bday !!!

Gift me a promise

Gift yourself smiles.
It keeps your life vibrant.

Gift yourself happiness.
It gives your life youthfulness.

Gift yourself hope.
It gives your life a purpose.

Gift yourself strength.
It gives your life a reason to fight back.

Gift yourself dreams.
It gives your life a whole new perspective.

Gift yourself love,
It makes your life worth living.

And gift me the promise,
that you would cherish
your own gifts for a lifetime.
It would give my life a meaning.

Some more scribbles - Elusive Silence

Tears slip by

slowly stepping down

the cheek

time is no longer day, month or year,

dates drowned in the past,

moments which used to excite

have lost their worth

memories hurt

evoking a million feelings

anguish, fear, betrayal

and then

subside like a wave,

eyes gazing far

trying to hide

flaring thoughts

voices murmur, clash, clutter inside

words said unsaid,

questions, regrets

pain like a vast desert

touches horizon

where shall I run?

peace is a mirage

a picture incomplete

in a cracked mirror

deluded, confused;

outside

silence prevails

terse, calm, misunderstood

somewhere

deep inside

silence is a flattering illusion.

My Priced Possession

A true friend is someone I have always longed for. And it was during one of those lonely moments, I found solace in poetry.

I take immense pleasure in letting my emotions out through words that find a secret, sacred place in my poetry notebook. I dream my dreams here, I vent my anger here, I shed my tears here, I smile my smiles here, and I pen down my words of wisdom here.

As I flip through it’s pages, I realize how much I have endured in life and how much I have enjoyed. The stained memories of failures and successes have been captured here for eternity.

To me, it is more than just a bunch of papers. It has taught me to be my own friend, it has helped me explore my inner self,and it has enabled me to make a verse out of every worse situation.

So it remains, till date, to be my most priced possession.

Best Friend

To pamper me with smiles,
was your vow.
To shower me with happiness,
was your pledge.
To overwhelm me with joy,
was your word of honor.
To delight me with bliss,
was your assurance.
To indulge me in ecstasy,
was your oath.
Rescue me, my love,
before the next drop of tear trickles down.

Dedicated to my closest friend !!

What do i call it.. Insomnia??!!??

Y such a restless feeling, unable to sleep inspite of reading, painting, running... tried every possible thing...body not reacting to anything... except being stubborn and keeping eyes wide awake.

So wide awake, writing my 2nd blog for the day.. sigh*

Dreaming a make believe life,
based on that i feel hopeful
and it would take in a shape
and breathe a life.

Talked, Thought and even Covertly wrote about it.
Just made me get obsessed as if it was everything to me...

To some unfortunates,
life's a nightmare, and dreams are merely dreams....
Its been soo long and only now do i realize am unfortunate, shattered, disconsolate and maybe even heartbroken....

It’s 0106 hrs....
I refuse to sleep,
for fear of dreaming

(i just re-read my blog.. i am sure its all over the place... well i guess its a typical rant...!! )

I am bored!!!

I'm bored...

Gimme just one day.... just one day... to live my life.. just for myself...

I'm bored of living for others, doing things for others, being sweet and caring, being responsible and true, being hypocritical (that i'm a happy-go-lucky-gal) and dreamy... all that crap that doused my desires to be what I want to be....

this is not the place where I want to be... this is not my world.... just looking for the curtains to come down.. elegantly-yet-quickly... and that night... i will celebrate life!

I wrote this poem with something itching my mind, the poem is as broken as my thought process, but as I was getting closer to the end (if I can call it so), I couldn't tolerate the dampness any further...!

(Poem Begins)

I woke up today,
If not for a beautiful day,
Just survived, I must say.
Tomorrow, I will wake up, not a new me,
But will let the day be,
Will pray, to wait and see.
With the morning cuddles in bed, when it is cold,
Last-night-sweet-nothings in memories to hold
Let just another brand new day unfold.
Another day comes, will I wake up?
Will the monotony, with me, break up?
Will this gloom move away? Will I let myself cheer up?
I see a dream coming near,
I take each step with tears and fear,
A new day will dawn, I hope, would be beautifully clear.
A broken poem this is,
I know, this game is all His,
End of the day, all I ask is the Bliss.
I might continue this poem, on and on,
Even after all the people around me are gone...

(Poem Forcibly Ends)

I luv u Jells, Bindu, Gogo, Shiznet & Ponchito...U guys are why am still wat i am....!!

Deeply D....

Am engulfed in this world of darkness,
the beaming lights seeming like a distant brume.

Silence is all that I can hear,
the encircling noises becoming mute spectators.

This world of mine comes to a shocking halt,
mindless to the movements around.

I am here deluging in tears,
but my smile giving me a deceptive outlook.

My heart grows heavy,
stubborn to pay no attention to the lighter side of life.

The friend I had in my solitude,
turns away, disguised as loneliness,
the people around fading into insignificance.

Why do the heartbeats echo??

"I lost my heart somewhere, all of a sudden,
but my eyes know this.
In the silent depths of your looks
is where my heart is restless,
lost.

But you are unaware......"

Sth that keeps me goin!!

Full of emotions, can be strong , rusty, painful but keeps me going whenever am down. 

I love writing them poetries :) 

Disturbed mind is it ?!?!

Tears slip by slowly stepping down the cheek,

time is no longer day, month or year,

dates drowned in the past,

moments which used to excite have lost their worth,

memories hurt evoking a million feelings,

anguish, fear, betrayal and then subside like a wave,

eyes gazing far trying to hide flaring thoughts,

voices murmur, clash, clutter inside,

words said unsaid,

questions, regrets

pain like a vast desert touches horizon

where shall I run?

peace is a mirage

a picture incomplete in a cracked mirrordeluded, confused;

outside silence prevails

terse, calm,

misunderstood somewhere deep inside,

silence is a flattering illusion.

Beeming Smile....The word Happiness by itself can make you smile if you are in a good mood, or can reflect all the bad memories if you are in a dull mood, and can set your minds thinking psychologically if you are bit crazy:)
Thinking of the last one, what is your ultimate goal in life? Some say, thats the question which drives our lives, some say its attaining Moksha or Nirvana, some say it is to perform our duties and responsibilities, and some even say its to reach near God! These are all spiritual goals in one way or another. What about materialistic goals? Earning money or becoming famous or is it living happily? I know I know, its all to a few and something arguable.

I remember studying a story about these three brothers. I don’t remember it fully, but it was something about them settling the dispute over the inheritance of wealth or something, the King announced that who ever is successful after 3 years, he would be chosen as the favourable chosen person. The chosen one was a poor farmer, but he was happy. The story ends with the moral that contentment is the ultimate wealth.
Every person in this world faces troubles. There happens mood swings when all thoughts pour in your mind. There self-development and inspirational websites help to some extent to give instant boost, but the effects fade away easily and it true. In many of the websites, they preach to develop friends, or to get busy in something or other, or to work towards your goals and etc. But for all, you need a teeny li’l inspiration, a lovely pat, a small cheer up or a wonderful smile…If you are happy and smiling, you can give a try making others smile too and talking them out. But what if you are not? Thats where we need to improve.
Some people call up their friends to talk. They are lucky to have such close ones to talk them out. But there are situations when they are not reachable or times when we cannot reveal to others. Some just brood over for some time and then recover themselves. Some just hide it in the corner of their heart leaving them to pile up and live as if nothing happened. Then when limit reaches, everything blurts out leaving you shattered. Is this worth? Can’t we share out? No. Because people are not willing to hear out the troubles of others, but just expects the world to solve all the problems.
Why don’t we share both the happiness and sorrows. Have people become so narrow minded or selfish? Some blame it on individual behaviour and some blame on the rules of the society. But isn’t it influenced by the environment we live in? Why don’t people change themselves and love others, instead of learning to hurt them. Why don’t they realize that the source of happiness and peace is themselves? As usual, there would be no answer…!!

Life happens when you are busy with other things....

I have heard this line a thousand times over… never gave it much thought..  but suddenly with a lot of time in my hands all I had to do was think about anything under the sun..The headline is so true though, I found out during one of these thinking sessions… we are all so engaged with the idea of survival that we forget that theres more to life than just doing what we are supposed to do.. So my point is , though we tend to forget it, that is what life is, the freedom of doing what you want to do seems to be used seldom. I saw this ad recently on this indian channel, beautifully puts it “reclaim your life” In a few months, or say weeks ( wishful thinking til that happens, few may be a lil more than a few) will be back in the corporate world, but i will also have succumbed to the norms set in some invisible way that defines the right from the wrong. I really wonder though, when will I ever find a lil time for myself like I have today.. now I feel bored and keep thinking of when will I head back to work. I need something to do.. then it hits me, this might be the last few days/weeks of my life that I have this lavishly lazy time all to myself.. the thought brightens me up.. I am alive, free and nothing is stopping me from doing what I wanna do.. which brings up the question what do I wanna do??? well, i’ll save that for the next blog.

Lat ulajhi sulja jaa balam!!!!!!

Rahman weaves his magical thread once more, he attempts to blend a trance groove with Indian classical vocals in Manmohini Morey. No Kidding? Exceptionally attractive, thanks especially to the underrated vocals of Vijay Prakash. Sounds so different from his previous numbers. Rahman's classical sense sharpens; is mindblowing as he composes this addictive melody while capturing the intricacies, nuances and specialties of the Indian classical style. Only he can do it!!!!. It has got a quasi-trance beat to it which takes this song to new levels of gratification. It is set in raag Bheempalas, whose carnatic equivalent is Raagam Abheri . There could have been more improvisation and that it could've have been longer, but the purely techno orchestration gives the song its other-worldiness. Rahman rocks as usual!!!

Song of the day - Kahin To Hogi

My fav verse in this song:

Saansein Kho gayi hain kiski aahon mein?
Main Kho gayee hoon jaane kis kis aahon mein?
Manzilon se raahein dhoondti chali
Kho gayi hai manzil kahin raahon mein

and Ofcourse
Jaane na kahaan woh duniya hai
Jaane na woh hai bhi ya nahin
Jahaan meri zindagi mujhse
Itni kha fa nahin

Awwww... sooo cute.. !!!!! I miss u rats:( Oh wait u were the meow !!!

I simply cant blog Saala!!! :)

Ok After gettin myself obsessed with the song kabhi Kabhi from Jaane tu Ya Jaane Na, I got to know that the movie was playing at the theater down the street from me. I couldn't resist but get myself to the theater.

Gathered a few folks and went to watch the movie. It was such a cute movie. I just got 3 words to say "I loved it”!! I had my share of laughs, tears and masti.
I could so relate to a lot of things in the movie and especially the song:). It made me miss some1 soo much :(:(, its indescribable. I am obsessed with that song Kabhi Kabhi Aditi. It has been looping everywhere, be it car, home, work or phone :P

Imran and Genelia - Ultra cute
Rahmans music - soothing to ears
"Kabhi Kabhi" - Chirpy
"Kahin To" - romantic &
"Pappu cant dance" - silly & hilarious :)

I think i will be talking about this movie to every1 I see for a few days/weeks.. BEWARE
:)

Kabhi Kabhi "Dosti" Aditi :)

Some things are very sentimental and close to heart. For some reason this song falls in that category, I feel like this song was written for me...and definitely cheers me up.
Rahman has done a great job with this song and the lyrics - really cute.

♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪
Film: Jaane Tu YA Jaane Na
Music: AR Rahman
Singer: Rashid Ali
Lyrics: Abbas Tyrewala

♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪♥♪

Kabhi kabhi Aditi zindagi mein yunhi koi apna lagta hai
Kabhi kabhi woh bichhad jaaye to ek sapna lagta hai
Aise mein koi kaise apne aansuon ko behne se roke?
Aur kaise koi soch le everything’s gonna be okay?

Kabhi kabhi to lage zindagi mein rahi na khushi aur na mazaa
Kabhi kabhi to lage har din mushkil aur har pal ek sazaa
Aise mein koi kaise muskuraaye kaise hans de khush hoke?
Aur kaise koi soch le everything’s gonna be okay?

Soch zara jaan-e-jaan tujhko humein kitna chahte hain
Rote hain hum bhi agar teri aankhon mein aansoo aate hain
Gaana to aata nahin hai magar phir bhi hum gaate hain
Hey, Aditi.. Maan kabhi kabhi saare jahaan mein andhera hota hai
Lekin raat ke baad hi to savera hota hai

Kabhi kabhi Aditi zindagi mein yunhi koi apna lagta hai
Kabhi kabhi woh bichhad jaaye to ek sapna lagta hai

Hey, Aditi.. hans de, hans de, hans de, hans de, hans de.. Hans de tu zara
Nahin to bas thoda, thoda, thoda, thoda, thoda.. Thoda muskura

Tu khush hai to lage ke jahan mein chhayee hai khushi
Sooraj nikle baadalon se aur baante zindagi
Sun to zara madhosh hawa tujhse kehne lagi
Ke Aditi woh jo bichhadte hain ek na ek din phir mil jaate hain
Aditi jaane tu ya jaane naa phool phir khil jaate hain

Kabhi kabhi Aditi zindagi mein yunhi koi apna lagta hai
Kabhi kabhi woh bichhad jaaye to ek sapna lagta hai

Hey, Aditi.. hans de, hans de, hans de, hans de, hans de.. Hans de tu zara..
Nahin to bas thoda, thoda, thoda, thoda, thoda.. Thoda muskura.

Translation on its way :)

Realization - Smile and more!

I had to write something, since i have been soo badly wanting to write today..

I was listening to a song from 'Sound of music'.. 'Raindrops on roses .. These are a few of my favorite things'.
I was just thinking about this...there are so many small, simple things that can make anyone happy. Only that each person could realize that this is where the
happiness lies. Only when the person knows that there can be things which you see and do everyday can mean a lot to you.
There are so many such things which amuse me, excite me so much that i can easily forget anything that 'would' have been troubling me.

I was reading a friend's blog and had a picture of an old lady reading a book by the shore Fantabulous!!! that would be one of the
best places to read a book.... this thought made me think of all the many things that i like.. and it ended up being a BLOG
.. so many things around might interest you. From the start of the day.. through the day, till the end….every aspect of the day/of your life has a beauty of its own………

The rays of the sun through the windows of your room while you are just trying to get the last minutes of your sleep,

A nice hot cup of tea in the morning, rejoicing it by sipping it reading the newspaper.

Smell of rain, the freshness around, the sight the plants all washed green

Huggable puppies



A walk in the park nearby, paani puris in the evening especially when it has rained,

Singing the song which has just a big hit on the charts, as you try your hand at the kitchen.

Surfing the channels on the TV and discover that your favorite movie has been aired.

Reading a book by the fireplace, moon watching, star gazing and writing poetries.

The list can go on and on…….
.... I feel it all lies in the realization that the most common things can make you smile.
I hope that each person keeps the kid at heart alive to experience and rejoice the simple things in life!

Back with some "Realization" :)

I just realised I haven't blogged for a while and its been long since I posted something in my blog. Reason? Even I don’t know. Not that I didn’t have anything to say, but just that I didn’t know how to say it. But today I do

I realised how much i miss doing something i love. WRITING. I have been focusing on so many things and forgetting to do what i love the most. I don't know if I have a valid excuse for myself, when I say I was busy, but hey, I was busy..I was..with all the work and dance, yes, I was busy feeling happy at the same time, on top of the world about a lot of things!

Ok now, Ideas literally pounding inside my skull, I feel I would burst any moment now..Ok Janu stop, give a break to ur excitement...Now, back to work..Blogging and reading others blogs reserved for the night! :)

Nothing Endures but Change

I saw a blog by someone else, I can't remember where now, it was a strong objection to the idea of Change being the only thing permanent in life. It surprised me at that point actually that anyone could feel that way, and even more surprisingly protest against change.

Change is after all the cornerstone of life, of existance, of being. From the time something changed in the primodeal state of the pre-universe leading to the Big Bang, there have been changes, many of them violent and destructive which have finally brought us here.

I don't speak of change simply interms of natural ones either, but there are the ones that we as society bring about that are ineveitable. They may be gradual, indeed I believe that it is the ones that are gradual that last. Wars do little to change the human condition. Look at Iraq now for instance, Instead of living under a native dictator, they have practically been colonised by a greater power. But the situation of the common people remains the same. That change will only come with time, as the people themselves fight for their rights and for true democracy.

Change is inevitable, as life isn't fair to everyone all at once; those who are the underdogs today, will fight to be on top tomorrow. There is no point in bewailing these changes.The only difference that you can make is by changing your attitude to adapt to the change. Change after all, is better than stagnation; a stagnant society will quickly find itself overwhelmed.

Not all change may be good, though you may assume that someone is getting some good out of it somewhere. But that is no reason to to fear chage. Indeed, I fear the opposite, unchangingness- for the simple reason, that that which is unchanging, must be so for all eternity, and eternity is not something I can even begin to fathom.

It has been said, that "the more things change the more they stay the same". That kind of reminds me of a fractal: those geometrical shapes which look the same in their most basic structure as they do magnified.

This may be true, but in that case the perception of change is important. For a poor man who becomes rich, there may be a rich man who became poor, thus balancing things out overall...or as we improve our standards of living, the poverty line may simply be raised, leaving the same number of people beneath it and so on....but the fact is change has taken place, and there is no stoppin it!

Lil things friends do!!!

The last 3 days has been a blur, with me falling and falling sick. I guess falling was not enough, i had the flu bugg chase me home with vengeance and was a victim of that big guy.


Evening happenned, a few of my friends decided to show up at my door to cheer me up. How sweet was that?? 2 of em showed up with a poker set and 4 joined after. I couldnt talk or move around much. I lost my voice completely; but i guess having friends around made my day. I badly needed people around and right when i thought so, they all showed up :)

Just how eventful it was!!!!! eventhough i felt ripped apart from my sickness.
Love you guys :)

Back to my ramblings :)

I cant believe i haven't blogged in 10 months. I am back and i hope to keep blogging more often.

Something cute for my friends daughter. The 1st thing that came to mind as soon as i saw a pic of the new born Stavyah!

I met you today
Not a word, you spoke!
A simple little look
My whole self was yours!

Cya'll with more of my rants:)

Song of the day!!

By song of the day i mean i have been singing it all day...Its the song from the most awaited movie Sivaji-The Boss. Thalaivar movie...thats rite.. I cant wait to watch the movie. I think Chinmayi has rendered this beautifully and Udit Narayan again tried to sing without his accent but i guess its tough. I still like this song....
















Sahana:
Chinmayi & Udit Narayan

Sahana Saral Thoovutho
Sahara pookal Poothatho oooo

Sahana saral thoovutho
Sahara pookal poothatho

Sahara pookal poothatho oooo
Sahana saral thoovutho ooo

En vinveli thalaikimal thiranthatho ada da
Antha vennila veetukul Nuzhainthatho
Athu ennudun thenir kondatho

Kanavo Nijamo,kadhal Manthiramo
Ooru aayiram aandukal semitha kaathal Ithu
Noor aayiram aandukal thaaandiyum vaazhum Ithu

Sahara pookal poothatho
Sahana saral thoovutho

(AR Rehman bit)
Dheem thana Dheem thana Dina na Dina na na na
Dheem thana Dheem thana Dina na dina na na na
Dheem thana Dheem thana Dina na dina na na na
Dheem thana Dheem thana Dina na dina na na na

Thalai muthal kaal varai thavikindra dhoorathai ithazhgalil kadanthu
vidu
Un meesayin mudi endra melliya saaviyil kulangalai thiranthu vidu

Boomikum vaanukum virikindra thoorathai pookalil Nirapatuma
Pookalin saalaiyil poov unnai yenthiya vaanukul nadakatuma

Oor aayiram aandukal semitha kaathal Ithu
Noor aayiram aandukal thaaandiyum vaazhum Ithu

Oor aayiram aandukal semitha kaathal Ithu
Noor aayiram aandukal thaaandiyum vaazhum Ithu Ithu Ithuuuuuuuuu

Sahana saral thoovutho
Sahra pookal poothatho

En vinveli thalaikimal thiranthatho ada da
Antha vennila veetukul Nuzhainthatho
Athu ennudan thenir kondatho

Kanavo Nijamo,kadhal Manthiramo

Oor aayiram aandukal semitha kaathal Ithu
Noor aayiram aandukal thaaandiyum vaazhum Ithu

Sahara saral thoovutho
ooooo oooo ooo ooooooooooooo

Sahara pookal poothatho
o ooo o ooo oooooooooo

Life is too busy and not fair................

I am back here .. Finally

The past one week has been sooper frustrating.. for starters, My net connection conks. had a deadline to meet. My writer conked. So couldnt send the documents I worked on after copying.. The cds I used must have emerged from a garbage dump and landed right into some manufacturing unit. I try and copy files, it goes to another comp and refuses to open my files. So there I went translating all the documents all over again..

Too much driving also. From one end to the other. Haven't been able to do soo much of work.

In between some good things happened too.. I finally got to catch two movies at the Theatre. One bad thing overwrote all good things that happenned to me. I am still coping from it. I am still shattered but i guess i will be strong in dealing with it.
Its really hard to see som1 u know suffering. I sometimes feel how strange and unfair life is... but hey life is never fair...

Let me stop my rant fro now so i can talk abt the men in blue..wat CAN i say about Indian cricket... bunch of losers...i knew this was goin to happen coz they had too much hype...i am dissapointed but they reallly dont deserve to be in the super 8's.
GO PROTEAS...all the way....

I will try to be more frequent with my blogs...

I wonder!!

Why do we so often live for the future and forget that today is our only assurance? I have lately been wondering why so many people continually strive to achieve something in the future and forget that they are living in the present. We live for tomorrow and yet tomorrow never comes. Sometimes I wonder if its really worth worrying about my past...which i dont. I learn the mistakes from past and try not to do that again.Other than that, Y do ppl worry so much about the past when they have today. Realization is the 1st step to enjoying and living a better life. Will I always disregard and turn down the thrills of the present for those of the future or will I ever actually reach the future? If I ever will, will it be too late to fully enjoy then? I wonder....

Nostalgiaaaaaa!

I was drivin to work this morning and i saw all these high school kids rollerblading and biking to school. Reminded me of my high school days where i would rollerblade to glory with my cd walkman(yea those were the days when we had those big walk mans)ignoring every1 in the streets. Nostalgia kicked in... It is usually the perfect image of something long lost. You often dream of how you should never have lost it, of how you could return to that instant, time, person or event and how it would make everything all right again, but on real terms, thank God if you never do. In time, the negativity of the experience levels off and creates an unreal image in your mind, which however is rather satisying to the justification of what once has been and now is lost. Yet, a single glance to the reality of 'what is missing' will most probably shatter all the perfection that your nostalgia has built up in your mind. The feeling is only perfect if left unhindered, as a thing of the past that has shaped you up into what you are and is now no more. The moment the nostalgic -reality- creeps back, it is no longer a good feeling of something good you had. Its magic wears out. It becomes a -possesion-, something you have no need to dream of and can't imagine as perfect, for in reality nothing is.

Fate & Destiny....

I had an argument with a friend about this last week.. I personally dont believe in them.

This is wat i believe destiny is: its not a matter of chance... its a matter of choice; You control what you do today; its not a thing to be waited for and its a thing to be achieved.

Its like what ever happened is for your own good... it might not feel that way going through it...but later on u will realise it is.

Fate is how things you cant control but assemble themselves. Still there are somethings where you do have some control over. Making an incorrect decision in your life when u were given an option and you end up choosing the wrong option. You cant blame that on fate. You were given an option and you decided to go that way.

I got this quote from a friend. "Life is lived forwards, but understood backwards" by philospher Soren Kierkegaard, 1813-1855. It is soo true!!!


But there are times where you have no control over things..Heading to work and you get into an accident. Is that fate?

Some say fate or destiny is a predetermined course of events...sometimes.. if its predetermined can we change it in teh course of our lives?
I dont believe in life being predetermined et al! Read this on my way tow rok today. "There is no chance, no fate, no destiny that can circumvent, or hinder, or control a firm resolve of a determined soul."

TGIF...

One more day and it's end of the week! Tomorrow's packed with meetings... lately I haven't been able to keep track of all of 'em! Reminders suddenly pop up now and then, and I go, "What? Meeting? Now?? Which one is it now??" And looks like next week is gonna be the same, if not worse! Really looking forward to this weekend though...but then i got my marathon training and all the show practices...Sometimes I really wish I were working in India or somethin, they have so many public holidays, every God has a birthday and that is a public holiday! And there are so many "Gods"! Whoa! :O

Losing balance on the beam of life

Today, I have this feeling that I am soo empty inside. Its like an empty space in my soul, like a burning hole in my essence that nothing seems to be able to replace. :( I hate the helplessness of such an existence. I wish I could go up to someone and make my mind forget for a little while, for one single day enter into a trance and drift off into dreamy currents of love and utopia without worries of work left undone and guilty feelings of a partly desired wasted life. Be able to comprehend the world and its natural and unnatural processes of hurt and a calm rage. How can love and hate exist within one single being at the same time? Why do people care for people who careless. I dont mother anyone now but my inexistent child, for though I want to, I don't(want to). How contradictory! & wierd! Just like the rest of my life. Some people can be so symetrical, so balanced, so perfect. So pathetic....

Motubhai Motubhai Tez Chalo!!

I cant get over Motubhai Sehwag!!! I watched him play yesterday. Finally i thought he got into the groove but i guess i was wrong. He got out in the most demeaning manner. Wat an unnecessary run-out that was!!!!


Thats wat eating too much and sleeping too much and not working out does to a person. He literally walked back to his crease without even looking where the ball was! He was already getting ready for his stance even before reaching his crease. I should say Sangakkara had an awesome presence of mind.

Really! i can only imagine dada doing something like that. Dada seemed more confident yesterday. Looks like Dada and Motubhai swapped places.

One and only " George Dubya "

Can anybody beat this ??
A friend of mine took this while he was roaming around downtown Toronto! Courtesy: Pic taken by Rano

Tagged - 20 Somethings

A friend has magnanamously tagged me with this tag. Dunno y its called 20 somethings.. and I dint number mine. Thank her for getting me to pen something in here. Here is what I could write about myself. It was surprisingly hard to think of things initially, but shockingly easy as the thoughts kept flooding in. Man! I didn't know I could write so much about myself. There's so much more I wish I could put. Oh well, lets just stick with this for now!

Three other names i go by: Jan, Janu, Jan-ANNIE ( yes its spelt the way its written)

Three screen-names: (screen names???)hmm...lemme think.. well for reals.. its hmm

Things i like about myself:
Eclectic repertoire of smiles & taste in music and food

Things i don't like about myself:
Procrastinating to death & pushing for perfectionism when its not needed

Things that scare me:
Meeting all my 100 gazillion 1st cuzins at ones.. Really I have soo many 1st cuzins that i have not seen every1 together.

Scared about: slowly losing my sense of humor as I get older. (Sense of humor? me? Beats me).

Hobby: I love music. I sing hindustani classical and carnatic music. Dance is my other passion, been active with a salsa school. I hate Programming with a passion! Thank heavens i dont do that for a living!

I catch myself stealing: Hmmmm.... You can catch me stealing a glance into a mirror if I walk past one! (I know many of you do it too!) So there, I'm not the only self-obssessed egocentric person around.

Something that gives me the creeps: I don't wanna be a grumpy old woman acting like the world is out to get me!

About me: Gullible at times or so Panchito thinks. Very inquisitive and straight forward. Sarcasm is a part of me(O'course for fun! NOT!!). I think i got that from my dad!
I get hyperactive when I am bed ridden-ly sick for more than 2 days. A perfectionist! cannot be good all the time!!! yikess

Bunjee jumped? I have bunjee jumped, a few times. (Did I also mention I'm scared of heights? Funny isn't it! sure i know wat ur thinking!)

Food: I'm vegetarian. What did you say? Oh..yeah! I eat eggs too... My point being, I love Indian-Chinese food and like sampling new cuisines. Mexican and Thai being my favs.

I like to read: I like to read a lot! If I'm studying or readin, not even the GOOD LORD can stop me. I am good at creating a bubble of force-shield around myself. ANd everything that hits me goes *bounce bounce* (sometimes, I wonder if I mistakenly create it around my brain, specially when what I read goes *bounce bounce*) Ok, I'm half-way there! *Phew*. Oh importantly I talk a lot. You must know by now!

Emotional: about music. Specially when I hear a good piece of music, be it instrumental or just about any kind.

I strongly detest: pretentious people, MCP's. and above all child molestation.

I regret: I regret not having picked a sport and played when I was younger. I believe I would've done well. Loved playin badminton, tennis and basketball. Beach volleyball is fun game and loved playing it in high school.

I love: strutting around and instructing people about what to do. I know Panchito wud agree! He keeps saying I would be a good manager ;);)

Intuition is: something I go by and hold on to with unimaginable faith when I'm helpless. A lot of strange things I've felt strongly about have actually taken place

Three essentials:
Music, Good food, Friends and Panchito(I need all 4)

I believe: that life is too short and weird as hell. I don't even know what life is about. When things go wrong, I think of me, the earth, the universe , and parallel universes and go "Whaaaaa? this is crazy shit." I don't even know if I'm supposed to be feeling what I'm feeling and why!

Funny thing you read today: "Every women should have 4 things : Mink in her closet, Jaguar in her garage, Tiger in bed and a jackass who pays for it all"

Thing I want to do badly now:
Sleep!

Dream Career:
Investment banking

I want to go on vacation to:
Australia

I want to visit:
Dude wats the big difference...
Kabul i guess...since u cant really vacation there now!!! WOuld like to visit there atleast 1s, I was told it was ones a very beautiful place. My aunt used to live there when the country was cherished, back in the 60's.

Three girl names i like:
1) Kriti
2) Parineeta
3) Shreya
(Heheh.. so Russel Peters gave a show in SJ a few months ago. He demonstrated how 'Hardik' and 'Sukhdeep' were among the worst names to give to your kids if you live in america, considering how they would end up being pronounced as. I think "Gopi" is another..)

A Song you sing a lot lately: Unwritten by Natasha Bedingfield

Are you happy this ended: U bet!!

Finally, I'd like to thank my family, my friends, andd...errr..wrong speech!

This is the best part. My chance to Tag.

Me tagging:
Deepa
Shiv

Why is MOTU still in the team?

What is up with the baldy motu still being in the Indian team..? I havent seen him perform since the 300 odd he hit against Pakistan in a test match. He is soo inconsistent and not at all dependable. Y is he selected for the worldcup? They sacked dada for not performing so y not sack motu?

Mozhi !

The song that i have been singing since i woke up...

Song could be found here: http://www.musicindiaonline.com/p/d/x/XsfgmdC4WS.As1NMvHdW/


"Kaatrin Mozhi"by Balram from the movie Mozhi

Kaatrin Mozhi Oliya Isaiya?
Poovin Mozhi Nirama Manama?
Kadalin Mozhi Alaya Nuraiya?
Kaadhal Mozhi Vizhiya Ithazha?

Iyarkayin Mozhigal Purinthividil
Manitharin Mozhigal Thevai illai
Idhayathin Mozhigal Purinthividil
Manitharku Mozhiye Thevai illai

(Kaatrin Mozhi)

Kaatru Veesum pothu
Thisaigal kidaiyaathu
Kaadhal Pesumpothu
Mozhigal Kidaiyaathu

Pesum Vaarthai Pola
Mounam Puriyaathu
Kangal Pesum Vaarthai
Kadavul Ariyaathu

Ulavi thiriyum Kaatrirku
Uravum Theeta Mudiyaathu
Kadhal Pesum mozhiyellam
Sapta kootil Adangaathu

Iyarkayin Mozhigal Purinthividil
Manitharin Mozhigal Thevai illai
Idhayathin Mozhigal Purinthividil
Manitharku Mozhiye Thevai illai

Kaatrin Mozhi....

Vaanam pesum Pechu Thuliyaai Veliyaagum
Vaanavilin Pechu Niramai Veliyaagum
Unmai Oomai Aanal Kanneer Mozhi Aagum
Penmai Oomai aanal Naanam Mozhi Aagum

Oosai Thoongum Jaamathil
Uchi Meengal Mozhi Aagam
Aasai Thoogum Idhayathil
Asaivu Kooda Mozhi Aagum

Iyarkayin Mozhigal Purinthividil
Manitharin Mozhigal Thevai illai
Idhayathin Mozhigal Purinthividil
Manitharku Mozhiye Thevai illai

(Kaatrin Mozhi!)
Kaatrin Mozhi Oliya Isaiya!
Poovin Mozhi Nirama Manama!
Kadalin Mozhi Alaya Nuraiya!
Kaadhal Mozhi Vizhiya Ithazha!

Iyarkayin Mozhigal Purinthividil
Manitharin Mozhigal Thevai illai
Idhayathin Mozhigal Purinthividil
Manitharku Mozhiye Thevai illai

The lyrics are very beautiful! I love Balram's voice. After his "Nee thaan en desiya geetham" from Parthale Paravasam, this is one of my favs.

-Janani

Weekends here!! NOT

Weekend.. doesnt make much difference to me... weekdays weekends.. all the same. Except that I dont have to goto work :p:p ; maybe catch friends who are on the 9 to eternity grind, I cant say i dont like weekends, I used to not like it before but now that i work tooo long would love a weekend to sleep in.

When i was a small kid, I heard my mom used to be really scared, not really scared but a lil scared to say it was saturday and there was no school, why???? because I would start bawling..and bawling. I know eh!! Wat are the odds..?? Yeah I was a good kid. Loved school. Went almost everyday and my teachers loved me, not coz I was an A student or anything tee hee :)

"It's raining men Hallejulah It's raining men Amen" it is right now! I took my baby Pasha (my cute shih-tzu & poodle puppy) for a walk early this morning and he loved it, Y? coz it was raining, & he also loves goin for 6 o'clock walks when the weather is just perfect for him, not soo much for me today!!! He had a ball playing in the grass and pooped in the grass; while i waited for him to finish his job so i can clean up. He was done, but he wouldnt come with me .. he sat there in the wet grass givin me a look that probably said.."u wait missy let me play for sometime!" . He kept playing and i kept standing in the rain, until Pasha felt sorry for me and looked at me with a face that probably said.. "Fine lets go!!, you have been nice to me for now!!"


The rain spoilt my schedule for a beautiful run that i had planned. Now i have to wait for the rain to stop or goto the gym. I am not a fan of going to the gym. Running in the treadmill is not like running in a trail. The Gym smells and is suffocating. I would rather run 5 miles in a trail than in a treadmill. Well thats just me!! unlike Panchito (my MAN!) he likes going to the gym, but i just drag him to run with me in a trail..

Well i guess thats enuff blabbing... So...On that thoughtful note i shall say something eatful... no thats not a word.. but meh!! u guys know wat i mean, I want to badly eat mexican food and neera u know how much i love mexican food, but sucks that i cant eat certain mexican food for atleast a year.. courtesy my braces... thanks.

For now I am gonna go make some nice breakfast and wake up Panchito(love doing that!! )

Fear.............................vs...........Evolution

Evolution......................................vs........................ Fear

Been thinkin about this for sometime...just tht i mite blog it to find out some opinions.....

Evolution has ensured adaptation in the human race to a large extent. When we feel cold, our blood vessels contract and they dilate when we feel hot. This changes the effective surface area for heat exchange. Out teeth chatter when we're cold. This generates heat. When we remain hungry for a long time, vital body functions are shut down. Prolonged hunger causes almost all internal functions to come to a halt, except for the most essential ones.

However when we are in fear or in an emergency, it appears that our natural response is not optimally suited to the handling of a situation. We panic. The thinking process is disrupted and uneven. Palms and forheads perspire. Instead, what we need is a tranquil mind for clear thinking. A solution that we may have been able to devise if we were calm, may well elude us in our panicky and ruffled condition. Why has evolution not been able to fine tune this aspect of human behaviour? Are fear and panic learned responses ? Would the natural human response be different for a person who has never seen the conventional human panicky behaviour ?

Telemarketers...Grrrrrrrrrr!

I am sure a lot of you would have all heard these calls, saying that you have been chosen to win a grand prize, won a lottery..etc No one is gonna give u anything for free in this world!!

I have registered my fone number with the "Do not call registry"; inspite of that i get to hear these telemarketers everyday... now they have started calling my cell phone as well...
Sometimes these telemarketing calls can be a gr8 time pass ...I have a few things i have told them and thought ill share them with you guys...

You can say these are a few revenge steps, tit for tat coz they do annoy quite a few of us a lot of times, no other way to get back...

Incident 1:
I was about to head out that day and i get a phone call. I picked up the fone.

Me: Hello!

TM(telemarketer): Hi! I am calling for Chase credit card! We have this offer for 0% balance transfer and went on for a couple of mins...

Me: I told him I am kinda busy, Can i have ur number so i can call you back

TM: No sorry! We cant give our numbers out to callers. WE dont want customers calling us.

Me: Now do u know how it feels!

TM: (for a change he said) Sorry! Have a nice day and hung up
The guy was nice enough to say sorry.




Incident 2:

Me: Hello!

TM: Calling from Carnival cruise and you have won this cruise, you are eligible to win a free cruise to the Carribeans

ME: Sorry am not able to hear u clearly

TM: (She repeats!!)

Me: Omg Can you please repeat, am not able to hear you.

TM mutters: dude this lady is deaf..and tries to repeat it

Me: Cruise wat? Who won?

TM: She is tryin to explain but she seems like she gave up

Me: My brother won?

TM: Sorry! I think we called the wrong person. THanks for your time..


Incident 3:

Me: Hello G'morning

TM: This is Maria from Amerisource calling regarding Mortgage rates etc...
(She probably said 200 words in 2 mins)

Me:Can you please speak very slowly because I have to write down every word your saying..

TM: (she hung up on me... )

Wat are the odds of a telemarketer hanging up on u!!!!

Incident 4:

(My tone for this call was very serious! I could swear she thought she got a customer!)
TM: Hi, we are calling from Home owners equity! we can give u some good refinancing rates. How are you doing today?

Me: I am so very glad you asked, because no one these days seems to care, and I have all these problems.

TM: I think you got me wrong. We are callin for Home owners equity! for refinancing your house!

ME: Nice so we have a house?

TM: This call is regarding refinancing your present house. So thats the reason for this call!

Me: So You wont ask me how am doing first? What customer service are you offering without saying a proper hi!

TM: How are you Ms.Viswananathan( Vis-waah-nathan)?

Me: Again i started off sayin...am glad you asked me! I have soo many problems and i need someone to talk to and am glad we are able to talk now.

TM: I think i caught you in the wrong time. Thanks

Incident 5:

TM: HI Can i speak with Janani( JAN-ANNIE) Viswanathan ( Vis-waah-neh-tan)

Me: Omg Reena! How are you? Long time no hear..I missed you? How is our bf? I never expected ur call! Hows aunty and uncle?

TM: This call is from....

ME: (I cut her while she was talking) Stop joking, you think i can't recognize u?
U still being the same prankster u were!

TM: She hangs up on me..

-Janani

Bears vs Colts!

Its the superbowl weekend. The roads are gonna be empty and gonna be a quiet weekend out here. (Hopefully!!)

Lets see what happens!!!!!

GO COLTS!!

-Jan

Kahan Ho Tum!

On my way to work, was listening to my fav radio station 101.3 with Don Blue, the songs were so repetitive and I dint feel like listening to the same old songs he has been playing lately, so i swtiched off the radio right after his blooper call. Some of his blooper calls are really funny!
TO my luck! I didnt find any cd's in my car and my ipod wasnt fully charged either.
I was soo desperate, i looked in my glove compartment for cd's. What are the Odd's Voila!! I found a CD; but me being a lazy bum I am didnt bother to name it.

Played the CD and the 1st song was "Kahan Ho Tum" by Neeraj Shridhar from Bombay Vikings. It was one of my fav song from before. Brings back soo many memories when i listen to this song! I used to listen to this song like 100 times a day and not get bored. Neeraj's voice takes you to another world and the lyrics are awesome!
Very romantic!! :)

Ppl who havent heard it, Song can be found here: http://www.raaga.com/channels/hindi/movie/H000970.html

kahan ho tum mujhe batao
zara kareeb se pukaaro

kahan kahan na dhoondhoon tumko
main awaara dar badar
nazar na aaye tum magar
chhup gaye ho tum kahan ho tum kidhar

ab to dil hai tapta sehra
dariya aankhon ki nami

yaadon ka laga hai pehra har kahin
jaana tumse tha jo roshan mera pyaar pe yaqeen
(woh) hai kahan kal tak to tha yahin

oh humnasheen
humnasheen

tum hi ne to kaha tha mujhse
subah nayi to aayegi

kisi ummeed ke sahaare
kar raha hoon reh-guzar

kaho kahan ho humsafar
chhup gaye ho tum kahan ho tum kidhar

ab to dil hai tapta sehra
dariya aankhon ki nami
yaadon ka laga hai pehra har kahin
jaana tumse tha jo roshan mera pyaar pe yaqeen
(woh) hai kahan kal tak to tha yahin
oh humnasheen

mujhe awaaz do
mere khwaabon ke sahaaron
phir se awaaz do

kahan ho tum pukaaro
mere khwaabon ke sahaaron
mujhe tum pukaaro

tumse tha jo roshan mere pyaar ka yaqeen
(woh) hai kahan kahan kal tak to tha yahin

ab to dil hai tapta sehra
dariya aankhon ki nami
yaadon ka laga hai pehra har kahin
jaana tumse tha jo roshan mera pyaar pe yaqeen
(woh) hai kahan kal tak to tha yahin
oh humnasheen

-jan

How Beautiful is Beautiful ?!?!?!

I was reading a magazine early this mornin today, while having my early mornin breakfast and there was an article talkin about relationships and how some ppl define beautiful. I thought it was kinda absurd. I couldnt stop thinking about it so, tht ill blog it before i head out to work!!

How beautiful is beautiful?

Lets talk abt a guy fallin in love with a gal, coz its easier.. LOL

When you fall in love in the beginning the girl is not of this world; he comes from somewhere else-she is an apsara, a nymph from heaven. But by and by, the more you become acquainted, the girl becomes more and more ordinary, earthly, and homely. Suddenly you find there is nothing-this is just an ordinary girl-and then you think that this girl has deceived you. Nobody has deceived you. Your mind is projected so that desire could move.

Beauty doesn’t exist in things; beauty is a projection. Beauty is not objective; it is subjective. One day somebody looks beautiful, another day the same person looks ugly. It is you who projects; the other works as a screen.

Once you come to know that the mind projects beauty and ugliness, that the mind projects good and bad, you
stop projecting. Then for the first time you come to know what objective reality is. It is neither good nor bad; it is neither beautiful nor ugly-it simply is. All your interpretations drop with the projections.
There is no way to experience your own beauty. All knowledge needs a certain distance between the knower and the known. If the beauty is physical then there are ways to know it-you can see yourself in a mirror. But if the beauty is coming out of your silence, out of your peace, out of your inner splendor, then there is no way to know it yourself, because it is not reflected in a mirror. You can experience it.

The most important thing to remember is that the beauty that you have seen in a person is not their own, it is yours too-it is everyone’s. The bodies may be different, but the inner fire is the same. And when that fire starts radiating from your body, it creates a certain grace, a certain beauty. It is no one’s monopoly. It is everyone’s intrinsic potentiality.

If you can see a persons beauty, that’s an indication of seeing your own beauty; The other person is nothing but a mirror to you. But it often happens…looking in the mirror you may see a beautiful face, and if you are asleep or drunk or half-asleep, half-awake, you may think the mirror is very beautiful. But the mirror is just a mirror; it is only reflecting you. In life, what you see shows much about you, not about what you are seeing.

The same sunset looks beautiful to one person, and to another, poignant. And to another it doesn’t matter; he remains indifferent. It all depends upon you. If you see the beautiful in me something beautiful has arisen in you. It is part of your own seeing; it has nothing to do with the other person. THE other person is just a victim! Today you find this person beautiful. Tomorrow if you are angry at that person, then too remember; if you see that this is the antichrist, it is your own idea.

This has to be understood deeply, because then you don’t create the illusion and make it objective. You should always remember that whatever you see in the world is your own projection. Yes, there is a state when you are beyond mind and all projections have dropped. Then you see the world as it is. It is unimaginably beautiful, but that beauty is a totally different kind of beauty; it is not your own projection.

Wow.. i cant believe i was being soo philosophical.. dont think am gonna proof read the whole thing.. sorry for typos guys.. buoy.. SO MUCH for having an argument.

Dilemma!!

Ok I am at work with a ton of work to do... and i get a phone call, just to make the day worse and there i am stuck in a dilemma!!! Y am i full of Dilemma's all the time?? They always hit me to the core and make me wonder!! grrrr

I am not sure what to do right now! Should i stick to it or try something new??

An Idle mind...Is it really a devils workshop???

An idle mind

I feel like spending this morning on my patio, just gazing at people walk by. Wondering if the landscapers who were landscaping outside are remotely related to the driver of the car who splashed mud on him while I was also trying to smell the rose plant outside in my patio. Having 'Boulevard of broken dreams' play in the background. Swirl all the white stoles, scarves and dupattas around. Clear my cupboard. Read a forgotten book. Learn a new recipe. Or better still invent a new recipe. Talk to friends I've neglected. Dance on the roof, sing in the shower. Go through dusty photo albums. Just some of the ideas that never strike me when I have the time for them. Well, wat can we say abt idle mind?? Can it be a devils workshop??

BEaauTY + BrraINS = ERRROR: Invalid Operation

No song this time.. but something random that popped up in my mind while i was watchin tv last nite... THought ill blog it.

The Indian women are among the most beautiful in the world: the results at international beauty contests over the last several years have established that. And I am not accepting the brains part that the organizers insist goes with beauty at these contests. The questions asked at the contests to test their brains are inane, and the answers equally so. I expect this is what the trainers teach them to do: " Read the question. If you are not capable of that task, as most of you aren't due to the time you have to spend in cuticle correction and navel wrinkle prevention, ask for an interpreter. This way you don't have to subject your eyes to any physical strain of reading and can safely preserve energy for batting them at the lecherous judges present. At this juncture I find it necessary to mention that most of you make sexual advances towards the male section of the panel only. That is quite sad, as you're missing out on all the lesbian votes from the female section of the panel. After reading/hearing the question pretend to think. Now the process of thinking is too long winded to be taught to you. So you can feign the act by concentrating on a spot on the floor of the stage, or gazing at an empty seat in the audience. Then take the deep breath and exhale and flash a "I've got the perfect answer because I'm a nuclear scientist helping orphans" smile at the panel. Now comes the least imporatnt part :The actual answer. If you've got the rest of the act straight, all you need to do is connect world peace, orphans, Mother Teresa, happiness to the question and voila! you've got the perfect answer. Let me give you an example. Q: What is the one thing you wish you can change in the world today? A: If only we could all spare a thought to accomodate *insert any of the above suggestions* in our lives, I'm sure the world would be a better place to live in. Those of you who've understood, pack your bags and go home. You're too clever to be a beauty pageant winner. And the rest of you may proceed to your eyebrow enhancement sessions." Having said that, of course I don't think most models are dumb! Look at me...All of us are! Note: Use of 'us' may lead you to think I'm a professional model. Those of you who thought that( MY GOD, LET HIM SAVE U) yes you're right(***sarcasm***) and don't read further. Those of you who didn't think that ( AM IMPRESSED), I have no new information for you.

Fanaa

Fanaa been wondering wat it really means apart from the movie meaning "Dangerously in Love" ......anyone look up the actual meaning of "fanaa"?

Fanaa (Sufism)(فناء) is the Sufi term for extinction. It means to annihilate the self, while remaining physically alive. nice eh?

It also says..."Persons having entered this state are said tohave no existence outside of and unity with Allah.
Fanaa is equivalentto the concept of nirvana in Buddhism, or moksha in Hinduism which also aims for annihilation of the self."
FANAA sounds so much more cooler than moksha? ;) .

Rang De Basanti

Rang De Basanti- Cry, My beloved country

OK I get that li'l "oh no not another one!!!" expression on your face. But let me tell you, each person has a different opinion and expressed differently. I saw the movie and here is MY review. I have read quite a few reviews on the movie.

Sometimes I make the mistake of forming opinions based on the reviews.
Anyways, after planning for the movie since monday, we finally landed up in the theatre (along with my friends...;) heheh sups) The opening sequence was good if not extraordinary, Rehman's music catches up with you. If I remember it was Swades last time...(and the Title music was mind-blowing there!) You are given a peek into the backbone of the movie. I won't talk about the story since some are yet to watch it. The feel of the movie right from the beginning is that of a lurking seriousness underneath a seemingly happy one. Or may I felt that cos I was expecting that seriousness to hit me since I was already hinted about it. But when the real characters are introduced the movie suddenly jumps gears and you are treated to a flurry of bike rides, car rides, gaalis, typical masti types. Characterisation is par excellent!!! I felt the role of Gen. Mckinsey (is that his name??), grandfather of Sue, was sketched quite well.

Watching all the antics of these guys, the pace of the movie gets easy. You know what they are, their backgrounds etc etc. But here and there, you will find few moments of "truths". The ones which especially ringed in my mind with a reveberating sound are about "life in India", the "can't help the nation", the "communal angle".

Once the REAL story gets going, the flashback and the history, the movie-in-movie, the guys get serious and more serious. Nothing much happens till interval, it's the fun part that gets the movie going in this part. Though, as I said earlier, one can smell the silent simmering it is fairly covered.


The second half is more about the realisation of the first part. Like engineers are taught, the 2nd half of the movie is the application part of the first half's theory. When the tragedy strikes (what tragedy... this plot of the story was out looong before..damn the promotions), the reactions from the characters and then the outbursts at the minister's comments, the demonstration and the lathi charge... synchronised perfectly with the past. But this is where the movie starts getting hyper. OK I was not entirely convinced by their plan of action, but then thats the movie. And the backfiring of the plan, followed by the next events definitely will keep the viewer interested. And then the ultimate letdown for me in the was the climax. I seriously doubt the government would do what the movie depicts. Even terrorists are given a chance to surrender... these guys are after all college students with no "evil" intentions. But then the second phone call Siddharth takes, from a Headmaster, sums up the balanced view of their action. I say, the ending could have been better, if not the acquittal of the five, as is the trend in the earlier movies, where the hero even after killing a hundred baddies is let free. But on second thoughts, may be the ending was suitable if not correct.

What it means to me is important. I see that the ending, followed by the numerous interviews with students all over country, depicts what exactly those martyrs Azad, Bhagat Singh, Sukhdev wanted. The message of revolt to everyone. This justifies the ending!!! It was the message that they wanted to convey to the people and probably didn't expect the shooting stuff. They were ready for a sacrifice but not in the way they had to give it. Hats off!!

Movies nowadays are not about rosy endings and happily ever-afters. They are as hard hitting as the "art" films once were, even if it requires the entire cast to be wiped off. Sounds good to me, as long as they don't overdo it. The movie was about the message.. and if it got conveyed then I see no problem with the ending. I may be upset a bit but thats the way I had to feel.

Now this is an extremely long review (review???). I doubt I myself won't read it again for proof-reading.
The movie was excellent. Everything about it was. The scenes, the scripts,the casting, the characterisations, the lighting, the music , the acting, etc. Just about everything. I was impressed from the start till the end. What was thought to be a college movie turned out to be something inspirational. No doubt the basic storyline has been done in many movies trying to awaken the young generation of India. I guess it's the way it is done that makes a difference. Sad to say that the message of this story would definitely be forgotten once a crappy movie


CAST:
It was good that the cast was not entirely star studded. Amir reminded one of his role in Mangal Pandey, so there was not much of an impact from him for me. Anyway, everyone knows Amir is an excellent actor. But lover boy Siddarth's characterisation of Bhagat Singh was mind blowing. That fella's eyes are so alive. I guess some movie makers thought they could only use it for love scenes. But they are capable of saying more. He shows defiance, resignation, fear, anger, disappointment, laughter and many more with his eyes. Siddarth comes as a very quiet cool guy in Rang but his acting potential is shown. Comparing in cuteness and sexiness is Kunal Kapoor. Tall, tanned, well built he comes across as an emotional muslim guy who just wants to live a peaceful life away from hatred. Gals, you got to watch out for these 2 guys when u see the movie.

On the whole Karan ( Siddharth) stole the screen. He was awesome.
The 2nd half was way too emotional for me.. i kept taking a lot of tissues.

Ok ill stop here...

Back from Japan

Japan was awesome! PPl are super nice! I hope to blog about Japan soon!

I have been travelling so much, i have no time to blog.. i know not a great excuse. I'll try to keep up!

Quotes of the day

A line I liked recently and thought of sharing it..

Quote's of the Day

"When you are unsure where you are going, go back to your roots."

A funny one:
I read this quote by Alfred Hitchcock today morning,

"The length of a film should be directly related to the endurance of the human bladder."

I completely agree (from some known experiences and really bad ones at times :( ), specially with the theatres being air-conditioned and them providing huge glasses of cokes.

Stupidity at its peak!!!
A got an email from one of my uncle's, he was askin me to "Please take good care of him." Who is him? I guess it was my cuzin but i kinda went to bed thinkin abt that sentence...I later realised that it was a supernatural being (a.k.a ghost) , a good one albeit. So my uncle dint mention abt his son but this supernatural being.. I know it sound ridiculous.. it dint make sense to me either..
Now the main part:

Three friends and our good friend the ghost, set out on a road trip to Lake Tahoe, and on our way, we get lost. Its snowing really heavy and we are driving at 80 and it 2am..

Since we are friends with a ghost, our friends from the other world can see and hear other ghosts. He duly points it out to us that the place where we were lost had "presence" and that he could "feel it". Not only that, we are kept company by a evil phantoms. We see cops all around, blaring lights at us, indicating us to stop.

Confused, we wait as the cops get out of their cars with guns pointed at us. We think its because they saw our ghost-buddy. We realize to utter horror that they are actually going to arrest us for murder. We have no control over the sequence of events as we are taken to jail. We beg my uncle who emailed me, who stays there, to take us out on bail. He finally obliges, good soul! Trust me, it was scary. It turns out that it was those nasty ghosts who did the murder and framed it on us. Why, I do not know.

And guess who the cop was? Seiously, You won't even imagine.

I actually woke up unable to believe what was going on. I paced about the room a bit. I had lost my beauty sleep over this ridiculously inane dream. Not wanting to compromise my sleep, I hit bed right back, plunging into slumber instantaneously.

This happened last nite.. I can still remember it because of its sheer stupidity. Oh! I forgot to tell you who the cop was. Tamil film actor Nasser. Y him... !!! i mean ok if i like that dude.. but i dont.. ewww.. but Y wud he come as the darn cop in MY dreeam..

Anyways... i think this was stupidity at its peak...